How not to?

Sometimes essay is good but it is not impressive. I am talking about the "full of information" articles that have lot of data but do not make right impression because of the poor arrangement. How to write an essay that has information but is not impressive? Do not think so much! Why am I sitting here writing all this? To tell you all this! Read on.

Forget about Unity
The first and most important principle not to be observed in writing an essay is Unity. Do not care about giving every head, every sub-head its own paragraph. Keep the paragraphs completely random and mix the content. Remember, if the reader finds out the idea behind your content in less than 10 seconds, your bad essay is a complete failure at failing!

Play (Badly) with Order
The second principle to forget is Order.Write the events without considering their happening sequence. Write death date first, then the date of marriage, and at last birth date. This will increase the overall badness of your article.

Be Monotonous
Forget about the variety and be monotonous. Keep the sentence construction same throughout the essay and make the paragraphs of same length.